All night long

BRING some playing cards. Bring something. Anything to pass the time. It’s going to be a late one. The Press Association has circulated a list of when it expects the different constituencies to ‘declare’ results at next week’s General Election and there must be a nationwide shortage of people who can count as the winners in Holborn and St Pancras and Hampstead and Kilburn are not expected to be announced at Haverstock School until 6am.

Some serious questions need to be asked here: Why should it take that long? With this suggested timescale, whoever wins could be delivering their victory speeches to a room of exhausted, bleary-eyed staff, campaigners and journalists. In those conditions, people can hallucinate and after a night without sleep, will everybody believe what they are seeing…?

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